Sex On the Wrong Brain
THE BOOK
“I like ‘Sex On the Wrong Brain’ a lot. If you like Douglas Adams and don’t mind a few ‘smutty’ bits, you will enjoy this book.” Simon Barrett of Bloggernews.net
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Spoody grabbed the nazdard and inspected it. He saw the symbol."A pyramid. Oh shit.""First zombies, and now pyramids. You're a lot of help."For the first time in her life Lulu felt like she was getting what older people called being depressed."No. THE pyramid. You got the Illuminati on your ass. This is a weapon. They probably use these to activate the zombie stage. They want it bad and we've got it.""I've got it.""With the Illuminati you'll need all the help you can get.""Next it'll be aliens.""You're right. Thanks for reminding me. You hear about the saucer that went over the other night? Came down east of here. This thing is weird. How do you turn it on?”
Yayo could see Bradley tap his head on the steering wheel a few times before he got out. As he walked toward the truck the dust cloud they raised blew by. Bradley slapped it away with his hat and looked in on Yayo. He recoiled when he saw the ear."You were driving too fast," he said, finally."My safety is not important."Bradley couldn't stop glancing at the ear.Yayo stared back. Yayo thought about asking him nicely to take the dark glasses off so that he could see his eyes."I need to speak with the authoritarians," said Yayo.
"What a racket," said Ord. He stared at the vornak orb for a moment and shook his head. "I can't sell this to the president. Hey, Mr. President, we need a blank check because if we don't stop these aliens...""Tell the president this," said Porgo. "If the aliens succeed, nature’s uncertainty will stimulate imagination instead of fear, dormant brain functions will awaken, and Earth's traditional power structures will collapse.”“Sounds like a bunch of new age mumbo jumbo,” said Spacklewass.“And women will be equal with men,” added Porgo."That should get his attention," said Ord.
Porgo took the wheel as Spacklewass removed the tongue clamp and mask from Lulu's face.Her tongue wasn't working right. She sucked on it, seething. "Aaaathohhhh.....""We got off to a bad start didn't we?" said Spacklewass."Thuk youuuuu.""Captain Porgo here will be doing your exorcism today.""Hello, my child.""I'm thweny athhole. Nithe thugking hatth."The rack creaked as Porgo took up slack. The gears locked with a click that was amplified by speakers.
See: THEORY AND SCIENCE
- Human nature, or sex on the wrong brain?
- Why females have less sowb
- Evolution, right handedness, and the sowb gene
- Certainty Deficit Disorder, fear, authoritarianism
- Greed, materialism, capitalism
- Sexual dysfunction
SEX ONTHE WRONG BRAININCREASES:
feargreed certainty intolerance authoritarianism sexual dysfunction
Ron was wrong
The device used to save doomed planets like Earth is called an oolak and unfortunately Earth's oolak had broken millions of years ago. An intergalactic maintenance team from the Oolak Handlers Union eventually got to Earth to fix it but the mission didn't go well.
SOWB vs DEMOCRACY
Humans evolved with two hands and two brain hemispheres.
The left hand is connected to the right brain hemisphere and the right hand is connected to the left hemisphere. This was thought to be an effective 'design' that helped humans survive, invent and use tools, and advance technologically.
But there was a flaw in that design.
Like the chimpanzees and apes of today, our early ancestors were about 50% right handed and 50% left handed. In the last few million years we became increasingly right handed and for the last 100,000 years or so humans have been about 90% right handed.
Why?
Sex on the wrong brain. Sowb is caused when right-handed masturbation burns in neural patterns that divert impatient satisfaction-demanding reproductive impulses to brain functions that require patience and objectivity.
In times of conflict sowb symptoms such as fear, suspicion, selfishness, and intolerance could prevail over curiosity, creativity, empathy, and cooperation. Slight variations in brain structure and function that favored particular or general sowb symptoms were inherited and compounded over thousands of generations.
It got worse as populations grew and advanced and began to delay the age of reproduction. Frustration increased and sex on the wrong brain increased.
Sex on the wrong brain societies developed authoritarian social structures and belief systems that cultivated sowb symptoms for short term survival value and competitive advantage and used sexual repression to increase sowb levels, prevent its diagnosis, and hide the simple cure.
While democratic societies have sometimes been able to reduce sowb-based authoritarianism by suppressing and regulating some of sowb’s negative symptoms, unregulated capitalism and authoritarianism now threaten to destroy Earth.
Regulating sowb symptoms is no longer enough. Humans need to address the root cause of sex on the wrong brain.
The left hand is connected to the right brain hemisphere and the right hand is connected to the left hemisphere. This was thought to be an effective 'design' that helped humans survive, invent and use tools, and advance technologically.
But there was a flaw in that design.
Like the chimpanzees and apes of today, our early ancestors were about 50% right handed and 50% left handed. In the last few million years we became increasingly right handed and for the last 100,000 years or so humans have been about 90% right handed.
Why?
Sex on the wrong brain. Sowb is caused when right-handed masturbation burns in neural patterns that divert impatient satisfaction-demanding reproductive impulses to brain functions that require patience and objectivity.
In times of conflict sowb symptoms such as fear, suspicion, selfishness, and intolerance could prevail over curiosity, creativity, empathy, and cooperation. Slight variations in brain structure and function that favored particular or general sowb symptoms were inherited and compounded over thousands of generations.
It got worse as populations grew and advanced and began to delay the age of reproduction. Frustration increased and sex on the wrong brain increased.
Sex on the wrong brain societies developed authoritarian social structures and belief systems that cultivated sowb symptoms for short term survival value and competitive advantage and used sexual repression to increase sowb levels, prevent its diagnosis, and hide the simple cure.
While democratic societies have sometimes been able to reduce sowb-based authoritarianism by suppressing and regulating some of sowb’s negative symptoms, unregulated capitalism and authoritarianism now threaten to destroy Earth.
Regulating sowb symptoms is no longer enough. Humans need to address the root cause of sex on the wrong brain.
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